Jump to content

Teaching The American Bloke British Humor


fedconusa
 Share

Recommended Posts

OK....it took a while for me to learn a few German words (11 years to be exact) and since the Germans want me enough to excuse my lack of learning abilities when it comes to learning their language, I've discovered my love for Benny Hill and Mr. Bean is still not enough.

 

Within a year's time, I should be able to commune with the best of 'ya and in order to do that, I'll need an extended lesson on British humor. You can begin by telling me the best swear words and their meanings. make it clean or relay to me it's meaning in a way that won't have me targeting your city for nuclear decimation.

:dance::poki::dance::poki:

 

Here's what I know:

 

British: "Pissed means drunk". In American: "Pissed means extremley angry"

British: "Football means soccor". In American: "Football is Football"

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Replies 67
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

US pants are trousers over here. Not a good one to get mixed up.

 

Fanny pack can get you in trouble too! Best to avoid that one.

 

Truck is a lorry.

 

Football is still football - its you who called it soccer :P

 

Theres a big list of words having different meanings in British and American English at

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_words...merican_English

 

and maybe we could all pick out the best from there too.

 

Stick to Monty Python quotes and you'll be fine :thumbup:

 

oh - and Bush is something to laugh at here too...well it is now.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Well, let's see...

 

Suspenders - US: something men use to hold their trousers (pants) up. UK: something women use to hold their stockings up LOL

 

Tramp - US: a loose woman LOL UK: a homeless person (US:bum)

 

Bum - US: homeless person UK: derriere aka butt aka bottom aka a*se (ass) aka backside

 

Hehehe - trouble looms with some of these language mix-ups LOL

 

Only Fools and Horses is a great British comedy. :YAHOO:

Edited by rainbowsparkle
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Here’s a few more things:

 

Fries in US, are chips in UK

Chips in US, are crisps in UK

Restroom in US, is toilet in UK

Apartment in US, is flat in UK

Elevator in US, is lift in UK

Vacation in US, is holiday in UK

Trunk in US, is boot in UK

 

To take the pis* means to mock

Fag means cigarette

Nick, means to steal or be arrested by police

Chippy means fish and chip shop

bottled out to not do something because of fear

twit someone being stupid or to hit something hard

Tea evening meal, late lunch

 

Also in UK we finish high school at 16, then go to college, then go to university when 18. We go though years in school, not grades. And we graduate when we finish university, not when we finish high school.

 

Also building in the UK, go from ground floor, 1st floor, 2nd floor. Not like in the US, 1st floor, 2nd floor, 3rd floor.

Edited by LouiseTrek
Link to comment
Share on other sites

 

Also in UK we finish high school at 16, then go to college, then go to university when 18. We go though years in school, not grades. And we graduate when we finish university, not when we finish high school.

only some (though maybe most) schools.

 

i was at the same school from age 11 till age 18 :YAHOO:

Edited by Keeper
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Marc, I seem to remember you using British terms perfectly correctly in a lift despite being green from too much mead the night before. And if we laugh with you in Germany, we'll probably still do so in the UK, so relax and develop a taste for warm beer, Marmite and black pudding :P

 

Jelly is something we eat at parties when children, not on bread with peanut butter...

Luggage (not baggage) is carried in the boot (not trunk) of a car...

A butt is what you are left with after smoking a fag...

And your fag may have been pinched from someone next to you in a pub...

Fish is grilled, not broiled...

Barking is a noisy dog and someone who's unbalanced...

 

And we use a rubber to erase mistakes made in pencil...

 

THIS has a good list off the main ones, but I'd certainly agree with not mentioning your fanny pack at Heathrow ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

In the US a period is this . In the UK a period is best not mentioned. . this in the UK is a full stop.

 

A female friend went to stay with her US penpal (when they were both about 14 yrs old) and was horrified when her penpal told her quite calmly that she had missed her period (meaning she had left the full stop off the end of a sentence).

Link to comment
Share on other sites

AAAAAAAaaaaaaaaaaccccttuuuuaaallllllyyyyyy

 

Going back to the truck reference. Trucks aren't Lorrys :lol:

 

Trucks in the states (Or at least in New England where I hang once or twice a year) are SUV's, H2's, GMC Yukons/Denalis, Chevy's, Explorers/Expeditions, Dodge Ram's etc etc. Then when you want to draw a parallel with a Lorry you're looking at the 18 wheelers. Yes I know there isn't anything in common, but really, you try and get an 18 wheeler down our roads.

 

So a truck here would be our poor excuse at SUV's. RangeRovers, Jeeps, eh.. um... Expeditions, Help me out here guys! I think we're a nation of small cars.... sorry "Automobiles" *snort*

 

Oh and please PLEASE remember that:

 

London is the capital city of the United Kingdom and of England. It produces 17% of the UK's GDP and the City of London is one of the world's major financial centres. The former capital of a global empire, London is pre-eminent in the culture, communications, politics, finance, and arts of its country, and has considerable influence worldwide. Alongside New York City, Paris, and Tokyo, London is often listed among the four major global cities.

 

It is NOT a country, it is NOT in Ireland and everyone does NOT LIVE THERE.

 

A subway is a pedestrian path under a main road. The Underground or Tube is a railway under the City and Greater London.

 

We drink either fizzy pop, cola or soft drinks and NOT soda.

 

It's COLOUR and not COLOR.

 

We don't have States we have COUNTIES.

 

We live in The United Kingdom of Great Britain and Northern Ireland. Eire is not part of England or Great Britain. It is its own country.

 

Great Britain is England, Wales and Scotland. The UK is England, Ireland, Wales and Scotland.

 

You are British when you are from Scotland, England and Wales. You are English when you are from England.

 

The majority of the Nation do NOT consider themselves European. And it's England that is playing in the World Cup.

 

The Union Jack is actually called the Union Flag and is only a Jack when flown from the Jack Mast of a ship. It is illegal for a civillian boat/ship to fly it.

 

We don't all have bad teeth. And our dentists are very good.

 

We don't all live in castles, however you can buy them if you have the money.

 

We have city centres and only recently (past few decades or so) have started with the American Mall craze. But these are not as popular as a trip into 'town'.

 

Ok, I think I have really worn this out hahahah. Any more facts you need?

 

Wait, one useful fact and something that us Brits can be proud of...

 

We are the only country that goes around round-a-bouts the same way as our water goes down the drain! ;):lol:

 

Don't start with Round-A-Bouts either. Just remember give way to your right and ALWAYS signal. Mini Round-A-Bouts are not speed bumps. You are required by highway law to go around them :P;)

 

Crikey mate I do go on abit don't I!?!? Hahahah.

Edited by Smaug
Link to comment
Share on other sites

smaug - a BIT??!!! :P;):o

 

 

though its about time that someone drew the political and national boundaries of the UK ;):lol: :lol:

 

one addition on that note - Northern Ireland - NEVER refer to someone as immediately Irish or British. there's some people who would be rather insulted by it, though not everyone. the safest way is 'oh, you're from northern ireland'

 

and a language difference - there IS a difference between the scottish/northern ireland accents, so if you're not sure, just ask the 2 places ;)

 

EDIT - also, northern ireland is NOT ulster - Ulster takes in 3 other counties as well as those in northern ireland ;)

Edited by Keeper
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Don't start with Round-A-Bouts either. Just remember give way to your right and ALWAYS signal. Mini Round-A-Bouts are not speed bumps. You are required by highway law to go around them ;) ;)

 

Dont they call round-a-bouts Traffic circles in the US..lol

 

I remember vividly when chris visited a friend in seattle a few years back..they had just had their first round-a-bout installed on bainbridge island and none of the habitants knew how to use it...they had to send out a letter to every household explaining how it works

Edited by DisneyDude78
Link to comment
Share on other sites

yeah, I ramble ;)

 

Northern Ireland is an 'area' of Ireland that consists of 6 counties in the North of Ireland.

 

It's a political time bomb best left alone. You can (if you know what you're listening for) tell the difference between an Eire accent and an NI accent, but if unsure just say: "What part of Ireland are you from?"

 

Ulster Gaelic is different from Eire as well. Difference in the way certain words are said.

 

Also, the Scots were an Irish tribe... lets not forget that.. .heh.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Don't start with Round-A-Bouts either. Just remember give way to your right and ALWAYS signal. Mini Round-A-Bouts are not speed bumps. You are required by highway law to go around them :wub::P

 

Dont they call round-a-bouts Traffic circles in the US..lol

 

I remember vividly when chris visited a friend in seattle a few years back..they had just had their first round-a-bout installed on bainbridge island and none of the habitants knew how to use it...they had to send out a letter to every household explaining how it works

 

A traffic circle is similar but not the same as a round about. Something similar would be a junction on the A1 for example. Where you have a stretch of road that goes right the way around the junction. So you come off the south bound lane and then up to the junction you go alllllll the way around to go back onto the north bound side. That I think, by definition is a traffic circle. Then if you get really bored you can just drive around all day.

 

They had a proper round-a-bout installed in Florida (a lump of circular greenary with multiple junctions around it) and the Americans couldn't go around it. Aparently all the Brits on holiday set up deck chairs and had a day out just watching them negotiate it. ;)

 

If that confused you fellow Americans DON'T GO TO SWINDON!!!!!!!!! The magic round-a-bout could proove a potential disaster! And NO I am not explaining it.

 

 

Also don't come here and say "You have an awesome accent!!!!" Because we DONT have accents as we are English speaking English. Technically it is you that have the accent as you are Amercians speaking English. ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't mean 'quirks'! I mean that you can read something and it's clearly Ulster Gaelic and then something else and it's the same thing but in Eire.

 

I'll find you an example *accepts mission*

Link to comment
Share on other sites

unless you mean the difference between 'ulster scots' and Gaelic :wub:

 

 

remember, a few years ago, there were signs torn down in areas of belfast that were supposedly written in Gaelic? they were written in ulster scots... the people who were on the same general political side were the ones who tore the signs down, because they hadn't bothered to find out why these signs were in their own neighbouthoods!! ;)

 

 

but when talkin about Ulster Gaelic, i'm talkin about the same thing as is the gaeltach (sp?) areas of Donegal :P;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I appear to have meself confuddled. There isn't any difference in the spelling, yes it is infact the pronunciation.

 

The two differences being Ulster and Munster. For example:

 

Tír gan teanga, tír gan anam is said teer gon chong-ga, teer gon on-um al la Munster and cheer gan changa cheer gan on-am al la Ulster.

 

This is what happens when you try and do too much at once.... !!! ;)

 

However we are now so far off-topic....!!! ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

not TOO far off ;)

 

after all, they need to know in case they ever visit with a show ;)

 

 

unfortunately, my irish is considerably more limited than yours - my sister was the one who enjoyed it :wub::P

 

so I can't understand what that means ;)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
 Share


×
×
  • Create New...