Smaug Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 (edited) CSI : Quotes Thread! List your favourite quotes and if you can find/get them, screen grabs of the scene they came from! "I have a gal called Sara and she would love that scarf." Grissom "The Hunger Artist" Season 2 "Like a dream I had, only it wasn't in a garage and Grissom wasn't watching..." - Greg "Big Middle" Season 5 Grissom - "Do you sell diapers here?" Store clerk - "Yes. So, what size are you? Thirty-four? Thirty-six?" Grissom - "Oh, they're not for me." - "King Baby" Season 5 Grissom: "I got ejaculate." Greg: "Me too." Grissom: "Get the surveillance tapes." Greg: "Yeah we need to see who came and went." - "Big Middle" Season 5 [Grissom and Catherine are examining a head] Grissom: Do you think a woman could've done this? Catherine: I could. [Grissom glances at her, then back to the head] Grissom: Scared of you.. - "Evalutation Day" Season 1 [Warrick and Grissom in a rollercoaster] Warrick: What happened to my evaluation? Grissom: You're sitting in it! "Evaluation Day" Seaon 1 Ok, you get the gist... now hit me with your favourite quotes!!! Edited May 22, 2005 by Smaug Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinababy Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 Grissom: Concentrate on what doesn't lie: the evidence Grissom: Greg? Greg: Yeah. Grissom: I need you to take off your shoes and socks. Greg: See, now we're getting into this whole strip forensics thing, and I'm not sure I can hang with that. Even if you are my boss. Greg: You infected me with mildew? Greg: All work and no play makes Greg a dull boy. Grissom: All play and no work makes Greg an UNEMPLOYED boy. Those are just for starters! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smaug Posted May 22, 2005 Author Share Posted May 22, 2005 love them!! Greg: I'm like a sponge, I just absorb information Grissom: I thought that was my line Greg: Yeah. And I absorbed it. Cats in the cradle Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinababy Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 [after Nick takes Archie to a crime scene at a software company] Greg: I thought we had a relationship going! What are you doing taking Archie into the field instead of me? Nick: Right tool for the right job, man. Greg: What do you mean? Nick: Hey, Archie? What's that "Star Trek" episode with that guy and the thingy on his forehead and that portal...? Archie: Original, TNG, Deep Space Nine, Voyager, or Enterprise? Greg: Point taken Greg: For the record, I really like having a spam. Greg: I'm like a sponge: I just absorb information. Grissom: I thought that was MY line. Greg: Yeah, and I absorbed it. Greg: [about orthodontia] I had it all - palate expander, braces, retainer, headgear. Five years of torture, but worth every penny, don't you think? Sara: Clothing, $85. Earrings, $30. Latte, $4. Getting away with murder... Grissom: Priceless. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smaug Posted May 22, 2005 Author Share Posted May 22, 2005 [after Nick takes Archie to a crime scene at a software company]Greg: I thought we had a relationship going! What are you doing taking Archie into the field instead of me? Nick: Right tool for the right job, man. Greg: What do you mean? Nick: Hey, Archie? What's that "Star Trek" episode with that guy and the thingy on his forehead and that portal...? Archie: Original, TNG, Deep Space Nine, Voyager, or Enterprise? Greg: Point taken Dude you just quoted my favourite quote ever.... makes me love Archie even more Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinababy Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 I love Archie, he's so cool! I'd love Archie Kao for C8!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smaug Posted May 22, 2005 Author Share Posted May 22, 2005 I love Archie, he's so cool! I'd love Archie Kao for C8!!! Definately!! Check out here for some brilliant Archie pictures... both actor and character!! Did you know he was in Power Rangers??? *loves* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinababy Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 (when hes wearing the mask and dancing to The Fight Song) GREG: I could have been a rock star. GRISSOM: There's still time, Greg. GREG: Whispering) Psst, Grissom. We got a development. I went over those swatches that Sara gave me from the bed sheet. GRISSOM: Are you whispering? GREG: I don't want that Gerard guy to hear me. GRISSOM: Well, he's not here, so stop it. Mia: Twenty-six used condoms...? Greg: Just like being back in college, right? Mia: Sara said you didn't lose your virginity until you were 22. Hodges: Good thing you didn't have to take a spelling test to work thefield. "Funtain" water? Greg: My people are Norwegian. That's how we spell it. So, is the "funtain" water in her lungs? Greg : Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall, ninety-nine bottles of beer. Swab one down, run it through CODIS, ninety-eight bottles of beer on the wall Nick: What happened to 'take one down, pass it round'? And don't you just love when he's dancing around in the headress? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarahoneill Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 Grissom: Didn't you hear him? he just told me he didn't commit suicide. Cool Change, s1 Grissom: Ring any bells? Rub-a-dub-dub. Dead man in a tub. Anonymous, s1 Grissom: I got a dead body. And a crime scene wigth wings. Something very wrong happened on this plane. Unfriendly Skies, s1 Catherine: I feel it in my 206 bones that this was a murder. To Halve and to Hold, s1 and a Brass line to add a bit of variety and to finish off Brass: Blinds were drawn shut. Side gate unlocked. Dogs let out. "A" plus "B" plus "C" equals 911. Burked, s2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smaug Posted May 22, 2005 Author Share Posted May 22, 2005 LMFAO I love these shows. *sigh* Gonna add this to my sig as well: Greg : Ninety-nine bottles of beer on the wall, ninety-nine bottles of beer. Swab one down, run it through CODIS, ninety-eight bottles of beer on the wall Thanks for finding that Tinababy! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mutley Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 (edited) Gil Grissom: High altitude enhances the entire sexual experience. It increases the euphoria. Sara Sidle: Well, it's good. I don't know if it's that good... Cite your source. ********* Gil Grissom: I come here for calamari. Catherine Willows: Oh... Alone? Gil Grissom: No. Sometimes I have a beer with it. ******** [Grissom wouldn't tell them how he learnt sign language] Sara Sidle: [coming into the room] What was that all about? Grissom signs? Warrick Brown: What does Grissom drink when he goes out at night? Sara Sidle: He goes out? Warrick Brown: Exactly. Who knows anything about that guy? ******** Catherine Willows: We're mid-case. Why do we have to do this now? Gil Grissom: Well, unless I get these evaluations in, I'll be written up. Catherine Willows: My goals... all right, for starters, I'd like two consecutive nights off. I would like to cut my triples down to 10 instead of the usual 20, and I would love to find a reliable babysitter so I could have myself some kind of a personal life. Gil Grissom: You don't have a personal life? Catherine Willows: Write this down: I haven't had sex in six - no, seven months. Gil Grissom: How can I help? [Her eyes widen] Gil Grissom: You. Advance, I mean. ********** Lady Heather is a dominatrix] Catherine Willows: How much does this place clear a week? Lady Heather: Ten grand. Catherine Willows: I'm not with the IRS. Lady Heather: Okay. Twenty. Catherine Willows: I don't make that in three months. Lady Heather: Sex pays a lot better than death. Catherine Willows: Plus the outfits are cooler ********* [after she has fallen onto the victims' blood] Catherine Willows: Don't touch me, I'm evidence. ******** Sara walks out to find Grissom pacing furiously] Gil Grissom: Ninety-five. Sara Sidle: I'm sorry? Gil Grissom: Normally my pulse is seventy, when it gets up to ninety-five, I realize just how mad I am. Sara Sidle: You're too hard on yourself. Gil Grissom: No, I'm not mad at ME, I have ten people working in around the clock in there, there's a body in there and that guy knows where it is, and I CAN'T FIND IT. Sara Sidle: So what's your pulse at now? Edited May 22, 2005 by mutley Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smaug Posted May 22, 2005 Author Share Posted May 22, 2005 Catherine Willows: We're mid-case. Why do we have to do this now? Gil Grissom: Well, unless I get these evaluations in, I'll be written up. Catherine Willows: My goals... all right, for starters, I'd like two consecutive nights off. I would like to cut my triples down to 10 instead of the usual 20, and I would love to find a reliable babysitter so I could have myself some kind of a personal life. Gil Grissom: You don't have a personal life? Catherine Willows: Write this down: I haven't had sex in six - no, seven months. Gil Grissom: How can I help? [Her eyes widen] Gil Grissom: You. Advance, I mean. LMFAO!!! *dies* I love it!! brilliant... *sigh* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinababy Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 Catherine: I just realized you and I have a very healthy relationship. Grissom: We do? Cath: Yeah, everytime we have a problem i don't paint greg sanders in liquid latex and stick straws up his nose. Grissom: Good, he'd probably like it. Nick: I thought you kept your don't read, mods please delete in there? Greg: I move it around GREG: What are you doing? GRISSOM: Good. You're here. Fill this up for me, will ya? (Grissom tosses him a specimen cup.) GREG: With what? GRISSOM: It's a urine specimen cup, Greg. What do you think? (Greg looks at it, scoffs and shrugs.) GREG: Okay. ....(Greg returns. He puts the filled specimen container on the counter.) GRISSOM: That took a long time. You may need a prostate exam. GREG: My prostate is just fine. I'm not a soda fountain. GRISSOM: Hopefully you are, 'cause I need a number two as quickly as possible. (Grissom takes out a very big plastic container and hands it to Greg.) GREG: (skeptically) What is this all about? GRISSOM: The victim's body was found in a sewer. Ambient temperature 80 degrees. The corrosive chemicals caused the body to decompose faster than normal. I want to find out how much faster. (He plops the dead pig fetus in the container with the mixture.) Today. (He pours Greg's sample into the mixture as well.) (Greg turns away - with the container in his hand.) GREG: (mumbling) This is some kind of CSI hazing. Make me appreciate blood and semen more. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mutley Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 Gil Grissom: You showered. Catherine Willows: Thanks for noticing Gil, you're very observant. Gil Grissom: [studying a surveillance tape and inadvertently blocking Cath's view] Can't tell what I'm observing here. What does that look like? Catherine Willows: A five-foot-eleven workaholic. ********* [a rat has just climbed out of a murder victim's mouth] Captain Jim Brass: Whoa. Gil Grissom: I think she just ratted herself out. [Later, before the victim's autopsy:] Dr. Al Robbins: Heard about the rat. Hope it didn't have any children. *********** Gil Grissom: Freud said that the only unusual sexual behavior was not to have any at all. After that, it was only a matter of opportunity and preference. Some people obviously prefer the feel of fur to the texture of human skin. Catherine Willows: Well, I like a hairy chest, but that doesn't mean I'm going to go bop a six-foot weasel. ********* Gil Grissom: [holding up the vibrator he discovered in a dishwasher] Well, cleanliness is next to godliness! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smaug Posted May 22, 2005 Author Share Posted May 22, 2005 LOL, it's when you see the quotes like this you realise how much you love CSI. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mutley Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 Catherine Willows: Whoa, this isn't half bad for college kids. Sara Sidle: Yeah. Why live in a one-room flea bag when you can pool your resources and live like this. Catherine Willows: Hey, how 'bout it: You, me, Warrick, Nick, Grissom... Sara Sidle: [shakes her head] Ew, no... Not Grissom. ****** Captain Jim Brass: There's no smoking in here. [a Magician makes the cigarette disappear] Captain Jim Brass: When you find that, put it out. ****** Greg Sanders: For the record, I really like having a spam ******** Greg Sanders: So, are you going to say, "The game's afoot"? Gil Grissom: I didn't know you were a Conan Doyle fan, Greg. Greg Sanders: I'm not. I saw a Sherlock Holmes movie once... by mistake. ******** Gil Grissom: So, let's see. You surf, you scuba dive. You're into latex, you like fashion models and Marilyn Manson. And you also have a coin collection? Greg Sanders: Weird, ha? Gil Grissom: Well, I race cockroaches! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinababy Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 Gil Grissom: Freud said that the only unusual sexual behavior was not to have any at all. After that, it was only a matter of opportunity and preference. Some people obviously prefer the feel of fur to the texture of human skin. Catherine Willows: Well, I like a hairy chest, but that doesn't mean I'm going to go bop a six-foot weasel. Haha, that one made me think of that bit in the same episode 'Fur and loathing in Las Vegas' when the guy got sick from licking the stuff off the cat suit and Greg say's something like "Well that's what you get for eating.." and they shoot him a look so he doesn't finish, that cracks me up!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Strider Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 Man, there is so many. Some of my favourites have already been added, but here are some more: "Only clue he's got is a missing boat, which sucks because... it's missing." -- Warrick (Pledging Mr. Johnson) Sara : Grissom, can you come tape me up? Grissom : I love my work. Catherine : It shows. (Crate n Burial) Warrick: "What are you guys doing?" Sara: "We're going to go blow up some bombs." Warrick: "Oh, I definitely got the wrong end of this investigation!" (leaves) Grissom: "Alas, poor Warrick." (Boom) Brass: "Where you been?" Grissom: "Proctologist." Brass: "Sheriff getting your ass, eh?" (Table Stakes) Oh..there are more Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smaug Posted May 22, 2005 Author Share Posted May 22, 2005 omg this show cracks me up!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
surfy_sah Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 my ultimate faves are: Grissom: By law you have to declare everything. Three bedrooms, two bathrooms and a skeleton! ("Who are You?" s1) Sara: Do you want to sleep with me? Grissom: Did you just say what I think you said? Sara: That way when I wake up in the middle of the night, in a cold sweat, you can tell me it's nothing, it's just empathy. ("Sex, Lies and Larvae", s1) Luv sah xx Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mutley Posted May 22, 2005 Share Posted May 22, 2005 SCI Miami time now. (Can someone id the titles and pm me em,) Horatio Caine: Bag it, tag it and let's see what else is there! ****** Horatio Caine: You're saying she married for love? Calleigh Duquesne: I know. Wonders never cease ****** [to Horatio] Det. Frank Tripp: Come on, don't you guys have some gizmo to track this thing? That blue light with the buzzers and bells or that mass-spectro-detecto-whatever-you-call-it thingy? ***** [victim is lying dead on the floor, with a knife in his head] Ryan Wolfe: Knife missing from this block could be our murder weapon. Alexx Woods: [sarcastically] Nice work, Ryan. Think you may have cracked the case. Ryan Wolfe: Thanks. I have a keen grasp of the obvious. ****** Horatio Caine: Nice work. Did you consider a transfer to S.W.A.T.? Calleigh Duquesne: I don't look good in all black. Horatio Caine: I beg to differ. ******* Horatio Caine: So what do you get when a six foot tall man lays down with a three foot long rifle? Calleigh Duquesne: Hot flashes... but that's just me. ****** Ryan Wolfe: [after finding out the suspect they are interrogating stands to inherit an island] That's a whole island, isn't it? Wow. My parents are leaving me their lawnmower. ******* Drake Hamilton: You said our DNA was contained in a single cell. How do we get around it? Horatio Caine: Your family? You stop procreating ******** Jimmy Fukes: You're not going to be able to prove a thing. Horatio Caine: That is a very dumb thing to say to a CSI. ******* [after catching a sniper who has killed 4 innocent people] Sniper: Don't you want to know why? Horatio Caine: You're evil, you enjoy death, and I hope you enjoy your own. ***** Horatio Caine: We are being detoured into the land of make-believe ***** [while examining the crocodile's stomach contents] Jeff Corwin: Nothing unusual... some fish... some crab... some... a-a foot. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smaug Posted May 22, 2005 Author Share Posted May 22, 2005 [while examining the crocodile's stomach contents] Jeff Corwin: Nothing unusual... some fish... some crab... some... a-a foot. LOL! Man to sit in the room with the writers of this show... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
tinababy Posted May 23, 2005 Share Posted May 23, 2005 From Big Middle, when the woman catches Grissom looking at her lingerie "Fat girl, gay guy.... it's not unheard of" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sarahoneill Posted May 23, 2005 Share Posted May 23, 2005 man this thread has exploded!!! grissom gay LOL!!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Smaug Posted May 23, 2005 Author Share Posted May 23, 2005 Doesn't the same lass (or maybe a different one) smack his butt as he walks away?? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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