Fan fic- NOT a comp entry- Realise

[Twilight_fanatic92]

I've already entered my fan fic entry, and I was just sitting at my computer thinking about how much i dislike Jacob, but then I thought of how he might have felt after kissing Bella so here it is. (I don't write alot, so it's probably not very good)

Wanting so much to repeat what had just happened, I clenched my fists with the knowledge it was pretty much impossible, she was taken, something I found hard to admit even to myself. I still had that shimmer of hope inside, but that shimmer was quickly dying, and knowing she would be with him for the rest of eternity didn't sit well with me. I've never wanted someone so much as I have wanted Bella, my friend, whom I so longed to call my girlfriend. My mind was stuck on repeat, the only image filling my head was Bella's soft lips and mine intertwined the overpowering warmth I was using to try and melt the block of ice that Bella's thoughts are completely consumed by. The smug turn my thoughts had taken would not have been welcomly received by Edward, though luckily he was not allowed on Quileute territory. I paced back and forth, in front of the very log we had just been sitting on, my thoughts all tied in one huge knot, sense was not coming any time soon... but something else was. Reality, he stopped several feet from where I stood with my back to him.

"Jacob" he said with a very light tone to his voice, a tone I had not yet had the pleasure of hearing, "Jacob, what have you done?" His question caught me off guard the one question I had not expected him to ask now rang from his lips the faint echo hit the beach rocks but rang back through my ears with overpowering force. My lips trembled, for I had no answer, I was totally unsure of my actions, why I had done what I had, what I had done. I turned to face him now, though his face seemed serene, again not what I had expected, but the small crease between Sam's eyes deepened and I knew he could read me, like a freshly opened book, something of near impossibility in our human forms, we had no secrets everything your heart desires, everything you try so hard to hide on a daily basis laid bare for them all to see, and they picked at it, like vultures picking at the corpse of other animals prey, scavengers, and I knew that as soon as I changed I wouldn't have these memories too myself. The thought of them knowing how pathetic I was to want someone who I knew would never choose me and that I have the continuous hope she might one day turn around and notice me became unbearable, and as I crumbled to the floor, wanting so much to be with her, Sam approached and lay his hand on my shoulder. I knew he was not here to judge me, but here to understand why I had done this, and how I felt- though no one could ever truly understand. I raised my head to watch the sun set, watch me set, and Edward begin, and realise that although I can fight my hardest for Bella's love, I can't compete with an Eclipse.

Edited February 1, 2009 by Twilight_fanatic92

[Mrs.CharCullen]

Aww thats so sad!! its really good!