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A different kind of change

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Ok so this is my first fan fiction and i hope you like it. My grammar and punctuation is rubbish.


This is kind of how i imagined Bellas change had Renesmee not been in the picture. i could have gone on forever about goodbyes to her family and stuff but i would have written a whole novel by then!


love to hear what people think of it.




A Different kind of Change



Suddenly it dawned on me, If I wanted to join Edward and his family properly, I would have to do it myself. I had always hoped that Edward would give in and give me what I want, to join him for all eternity, but I knew deep down that he loved me too much to inflict the burning pain on me himself no matter how much I tried to reason with him that the pain would be worth it if we were together forever. Carlisle gave me his word he would do it when we returned from Isle Esme, but I wanted Edward, it had to be Edwards venom burning through my veins. I suppose that’s because I would truly feel completely his and that we were one. I wasn’t going to wait around to nearly die! Sure I could jump in front of a car or something but knowing my luck that would just kill me!


I set my mind to work to put my plan in motion, I knew that soon Alice would be on to me, but I hoped she would keep it to herself considering she wanted me to be part of the family but she didn’t have the strength to change me herself and not kill me. I remembered the beaker in the Cullen’s bare refrigerator half-filled with the clear, but beautiful liquid, almost like liquid diamonds. Edward had extracted some of his venom to help Carlisle with an experiment of venom verses morphine. I didn’t see him extract the venom but I always pictured his mouth over a glass with cling film like you see on snake documentaries and the thought made me giggle to myself.


All the other Cullen’s were out hunting. Edward was playing the piano in the background whilst I listened sprawled out across the couch. I excused myself to go to the bathroom and hoped Edward hadn’t heard the tension in my voice as I lied to him. I walked into the Kitchen that looked like it was from a showroom, all the utensils in their right place, props. I headed for the cupboard where I knew Carlisle kept his medical kit. I memorised this the day Carlisle fixed me up on my 18th birthday and shuddered at the memory. I opened the cupboard door and was grateful the hinge didn’t creak. I grabbed the unopened syringe and sneaked to the refrigerator. There it was, that beautiful liquid that would change me forever. I quickly unwrapped the syringe and dipped it into the liquid and drew the liquid in until it was full. Carefully I then put the syringe back into the wrapper and put it into my back pocket of my baggy jeans and was grateful I didn’t wear something more tight fitting today. I walked back into the great open lounge and Edward was too into his playing to notice me slip the syringe out of my pocket and into my bag. My face flushed like a child who had just shoplifted sweets and got away with it.


After an hour or so, Edward woke me with a cool kiss on the forehead, I must have dozed off listening to him play.

“Bella loveâ€, he said. “I think I need to go hunt, will you be ok here on your own?â€

I looked into his eyes that I adored so dearly, they were still honey coloured but deepened in colour from his thirst.

“Of courseâ€, I crooned, dazzled by gaze “I love youâ€

“I’ll only be a few hoursâ€, he said. He kissed my forehead and again, and then he was gone.


This was it. My chance. But something didn’t feel right. The Cullen’s house was my new home, and it felt like home, but I needed to do this somewhere that belonged to me and Edward, just us, and I knew exactly where to go.


I ran to the garage and hopped into Emmett’s jeep. It was blocking all the other cars and he could take it out on me after. My mind was going crazy driving to the spot where I would then have to run as fast I could to our special place. I knew that Edward wouldn’t be away much longer as I ran as fast as my limbs would carry me, they burned but I thought of the burn I was about to feel which spurred me to ignore the pain and carry on further.


After a time that felt a lot shorter than it should have, I entered the clearing, our meadow. This would be the perfect place to do what I was going to do. This place that held some of my best memories of Edward. I sat on the ground. It was damp and I could feel the moisture ebbing through my jeans. I took the syringe out of my bag and eyed the sharp needle. ‘Ugh’ I thought. Was I really capable of doing this? I remembered the dream of me as an old women and it gave me a fresh spark of determination which drove me on. I got out my cell phone and prepared a text message but hovered over the send button. I’m at our meadow. Don’t stop it, just let it happen. See you on the other side. I love you. I knew I would have to be quick so that Edward couldn’t stop it. Now. This was the hard part. I carefully slid the needle into the crease of my arm. I ignored the flush of heat wash through my body that was sure to make me faint. I quickly looked around and took in my surroundings appreciating every tree, every bird, even the clouds that dimmed the enormous sky above me. I hit the send button on my phone, and then firmly pushed the plunger down on the syringe.


I led back feeling the burn slowly rip through my arm. I had just enough time to see a blurry figure hover above me before my eyes were blinded by the fire.


“Oh Bella loveâ€, the angel sang with pain in its voice.


And then the fire took over all other feeling wrapping its embrace around my entire body.





Edited by Edward Cullen Dazzles Me Daily

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Excellent.......I want to read the rest of it - I am gripped.

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Excellent.......I want to read the rest of it - I am gripped.


Thanks, i'm quite chuffed with it really. After this i picture her waking up like she does in breaking dawn and then them going hunting together. sometimes i just like to pretend Renesmee wasn't in the story so they could just be happy and not have to deal with the Volturi after. But still love the book :)

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