FANFIC COMPETITION ENTRY

[foreverbella]

Before you Bella, it felt like i had been sleeping forever, if only that was so. Though even if I could sleep now, I wouldn't dream because our life together is a dream come true. But at this moment I would give anything to close my eyes, stop the voices in my head and block out this jealousy that's filling every inch of my being. This is new to me, these strange feelings of passion, of anger, of disgust, but never at you my love.

 

I can only try to understand, all I want is for you to be happy.

 

If only he would stop shouting these thoughts at me, taunting me with the knowledge that you should be his, then maybe I could believe that you did it out of pity. But i know you my love, I know that you have too much compassion, too much love in your fragile body to keep it all locked away. I fear how you two share something that I can never be apart of, he has something that I cannot give you, that I wont give you, at least not yet.

 

A kiss, just a kiss, although i wouldn't blame you for wanting more.

 

Still I ask, what if I had never left? I would have you to myself, yet if I hadn't have acted that night I would always blame myself for endangering you, you see you are as breakable under my grasp as my heart is to your actions. And what if i had never come back? I left you hurting but just maybe he would have been enough to stop that. Ive heard you call him 'My Jacob'.

My Jacob.

My Jacob.

 

Yet to imagine my life without you, as selfish as it seems, is unbearable. Your body is mine to love and kiss and cherish, and i do cherish you, I already did from the very begininng. Your soul, that is mine too if i wish. And your mind, that I can only hope for.

 

As i held you tonight, warm in my cold arms, I wondered whether you had made the right choice. As I lay by your side my eyes never leaving your perfect face i watched the agony and despair so apparent in the light of the moon and my heart broke. For myself, and for you my love, for the pain that it is causing you. Whatever you choose I will always be here waiting for you, forever. I have lived this way for almost a century but in these few short hours I have never been so frightened, you look so breakable.

 

But then, when you looked at me, your warm eyes melted into mine and I knew where I stood.

"Edward". You breathed my name as you had done so many times before.

"Your mind never need worry my love, because I love you".

You see, your flaws are not flaws, they are the charms that tie your heart to mine.

 

 

Becky Friar, 19

Edited February 18, 2009 by foreverbella

[LeahBlack.]

Awhh, this is beautiful :)

Nicely written.

xxx

[foreverbella]

thankyou =)

[rosiealmulla]

Best last line of anything ever =]

[foreverbella]

aww thankyou!