well, turned out they never had sex.. and dont even know what it IS!
oh.. my god!
0
anyone heard that story of the german couple
Started by
sarah-4-eva
, May 19 2004 07:16 PM
29 replies to this topic
#1
sarah-4-eva
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Posted 19 May 2004 - 07:16 PM
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#2
sarah-4-eva
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Posted 19 May 2004 - 07:25 PM
"VIRGIN COUPLE: WHY CAN'T WE CONCEIVE? May 18 2004
From Allan Hall In Berlin
FERTILITY doctors were baffled when a perfectly-healthy couple claimed they couldn't have children - until they confessed they had never made love.
The husband, 36, and his 32-year-old wife thought that all they had to do to make a baby was to lie next to each other and let nature take its course.
When nothing happened, they saved up £7,000 and went to an IVF clinic where they were given a quick lesson about the facts of life.
A spokesman for the clinic said: "We're not talking about retards here, but a couple who were brought up in a strict religious environment who simply did not know how babies were created. It was only after they were subjected to a battery of tests and both were found to be perfectly fertile that we asked them how often they had sex.
"The husband said, 'We're not exactly sure what you mean'."
The couple are now doing a sexual therapy course, which, doctors hope, will lead to the child they are longing for.
The spokesman for the clinic at the German University of Luebeck added: "They seemed to think that lying next to each other at night in their bedclothes would somehow miraculously produce a child."
He said the couple had read up about in-vitro fertilisation treatment but believed it was something to do with a "turkey baster, a mattress and a woman standing on her head." He went on: "Although this does have its humorous side, the pair were woefully ignorant about sexuality.
"But at least they have a marvellous awakening to look forward to at a time when most people have long shed their innocence."
The university plans to carry out a survey to discover how many more childless couples think the same way and are in desperate need of basic sex education.
THE most important thing to do before starting a family is to find the right partner, according to a new survey. The next priority to take a job for enjoyment and not just the money.
"
From Allan Hall In Berlin
FERTILITY doctors were baffled when a perfectly-healthy couple claimed they couldn't have children - until they confessed they had never made love.
The husband, 36, and his 32-year-old wife thought that all they had to do to make a baby was to lie next to each other and let nature take its course.
When nothing happened, they saved up £7,000 and went to an IVF clinic where they were given a quick lesson about the facts of life.
A spokesman for the clinic said: "We're not talking about retards here, but a couple who were brought up in a strict religious environment who simply did not know how babies were created. It was only after they were subjected to a battery of tests and both were found to be perfectly fertile that we asked them how often they had sex.
"The husband said, 'We're not exactly sure what you mean'."
The couple are now doing a sexual therapy course, which, doctors hope, will lead to the child they are longing for.
The spokesman for the clinic at the German University of Luebeck added: "They seemed to think that lying next to each other at night in their bedclothes would somehow miraculously produce a child."
He said the couple had read up about in-vitro fertilisation treatment but believed it was something to do with a "turkey baster, a mattress and a woman standing on her head." He went on: "Although this does have its humorous side, the pair were woefully ignorant about sexuality.
"But at least they have a marvellous awakening to look forward to at a time when most people have long shed their innocence."
The university plans to carry out a survey to discover how many more childless couples think the same way and are in desperate need of basic sex education.
THE most important thing to do before starting a family is to find the right partner, according to a new survey. The next priority to take a job for enjoyment and not just the money.
"
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#3
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Posted 19 May 2004 - 07:27 PM
Idiots 
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"But when I see you out in heels, then I know you're not for me, but it's a different thing if you're wearing converse allstars!"
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I love Tash, she's amazing <3
"But when I see you out in heels, then I know you're not for me, but it's a different thing if you're wearing converse allstars!"
"Cheese is a kind of meat, a tasty yellow beef, I milk it from my teat but I try to be discreet"
I love Tash, she's amazing <3
#4
sarah-4-eva
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Posted 19 May 2004 - 07:31 PM
poo heads
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#5
yeltz-lass
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Posted 19 May 2004 - 07:39 PM
I think that story's really sad... 
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"Would you mind not farting while I'm trying to save the world?" ~ Christopher Eccleston, Dr Who
"You *always* bring a dodgy camera...!" ~ Andy Serkis at G-Mex 1
"I'm playing Tesla's assistant. The Igor to his Frankenstein, if you like. But without the hump, obviously..." ~ Andy Serkis at G-Mex 1
"It's a man's life in the Church of England - a lot of violence on the cake stall." ~ Canon Black, Strange
"Would you mind not farting while I'm trying to save the world?" ~ Christopher Eccleston, Dr Who
#6
sarah-4-eva
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Posted 19 May 2004 - 07:44 PM
it is isnt it, in both ways 
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#7
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Posted 19 May 2004 - 08:52 PM
it's wel funny. Amazing how religion can control that 
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#8
Willow28
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Posted 19 May 2004 - 08:58 PM
awwwwwwwww bless!!
Dancer right here 2 :p
and now qualified hairdresser lol
I Am A Memember Of The JSS!!! WOOOHOOO
"Its not a term one usually hears in civilised conversatons!"
To the left, take it back now ya'll
2 hops 2 hops, 2 hops 2 hops
Right foot let?s stomp, left foot let?s stomp
Charlie Brown, hop it out now
Slide to the right, slide to the left
Take it back now ya'll
Cha Cha now ya'll
and now qualified hairdresser lol
I Am A Memember Of The JSS!!! WOOOHOOO
"Its not a term one usually hears in civilised conversatons!"
To the left, take it back now ya'll
2 hops 2 hops, 2 hops 2 hops
Right foot let?s stomp, left foot let?s stomp
Charlie Brown, hop it out now
Slide to the right, slide to the left
Take it back now ya'll
Cha Cha now ya'll
#9
betrayed-deagol
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Posted 19 May 2004 - 11:58 PM
Im jus glad they have the opportunity to live life at its fullest now!
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#10
sarah-4-eva
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Posted 20 May 2004 - 09:38 AM
u cant live life to the full without it?
well, not the MAXIMUM, but.. so im lame *sniffle*
haha
well, not the MAXIMUM, but.. so im lame *sniffle*
haha
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#11
betrayed-deagol
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Posted 20 May 2004 - 12:50 PM
of course you can babes, u have a full life now, but they wanted a baby to make them complete n now they know how to get one!
" i used to beat my victims to death with a packet of rice crispies."
Stoatmaster!
"oooooooooooooh, Shiny!"
"There's definately a lot of Beaver action here" - Kate Humble, Autumn Watch
Stoatmaster!
"oooooooooooooh, Shiny!"
"There's definately a lot of Beaver action here" - Kate Humble, Autumn Watch
#12
Davey
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Posted 20 May 2004 - 06:37 PM
betrayed-deagol, on May 20 2004, 12:50 PM, said:
of course you can babes, u have a full life now, but they wanted a baby to make them complete n now they know how to get one!
Sorry
*sniggers*
#13
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Posted 20 May 2004 - 06:46 PM
sarah-4-eva, on May 19 2004, 08:25 PM, said:
"They seemed to think that lying next to each other at night in their bedclothes would somehow miraculously produce a child."
A professional Kell
"But when I see you out in heels, then I know you're not for me, but it's a different thing if you're wearing converse allstars!"
"Cheese is a kind of meat, a tasty yellow beef, I milk it from my teat but I try to be discreet"
I love Tash, she's amazing <3
"But when I see you out in heels, then I know you're not for me, but it's a different thing if you're wearing converse allstars!"
"Cheese is a kind of meat, a tasty yellow beef, I milk it from my teat but I try to be discreet"
I love Tash, she's amazing <3
#14
sarah-4-eva
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Posted 20 May 2004 - 07:14 PM
Kell, on May 20 2004, 06:46 PM, said:
sarah-4-eva, on May 19 2004, 08:25 PM, said:
"They seemed to think that lying next to each other at night in their bedclothes would somehow miraculously produce a child."
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#15
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Posted 20 May 2004 - 07:15 PM
Cuz I've shared a bed with people before, and if it happened like that then I'd be pregnant
A professional Kell
"But when I see you out in heels, then I know you're not for me, but it's a different thing if you're wearing converse allstars!"
"Cheese is a kind of meat, a tasty yellow beef, I milk it from my teat but I try to be discreet"
I love Tash, she's amazing <3
"But when I see you out in heels, then I know you're not for me, but it's a different thing if you're wearing converse allstars!"
"Cheese is a kind of meat, a tasty yellow beef, I milk it from my teat but I try to be discreet"
I love Tash, she's amazing <3
#16
sarah-4-eva
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Posted 20 May 2004 - 07:27 PM
omg, in that case, ive made SO many people pregnant.. marie was the last one.. *blink*
wait, what about simon, i was laid next to him on the bed..
SIMON, WHAT DID I TELL YOU..
i thought i looked a bit plumpy in the belly area.. oh no, simone.. wait, i ..wha?
marie was the last one.. *blink*wait, what about simon, i was laid next to him on the bed..
SIMON, WHAT DID I TELL YOU..
i thought i looked a bit plumpy in the belly area.. oh no, simone.. wait, i ..wha?
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#17
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Posted 20 May 2004 - 07:28 PM
The first forum pregnancy, well done Sarah!
A professional Kell
"But when I see you out in heels, then I know you're not for me, but it's a different thing if you're wearing converse allstars!"
"Cheese is a kind of meat, a tasty yellow beef, I milk it from my teat but I try to be discreet"
I love Tash, she's amazing <3
"But when I see you out in heels, then I know you're not for me, but it's a different thing if you're wearing converse allstars!"
"Cheese is a kind of meat, a tasty yellow beef, I milk it from my teat but I try to be discreet"
I love Tash, she's amazing <3
#18
sarah-4-eva
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Posted 20 May 2004 - 08:03 PM
teenage too!!
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#19
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Posted 20 May 2004 - 08:12 PM
Gets better and better 
A professional Kell
"But when I see you out in heels, then I know you're not for me, but it's a different thing if you're wearing converse allstars!"
"Cheese is a kind of meat, a tasty yellow beef, I milk it from my teat but I try to be discreet"
I love Tash, she's amazing <3
"But when I see you out in heels, then I know you're not for me, but it's a different thing if you're wearing converse allstars!"
"Cheese is a kind of meat, a tasty yellow beef, I milk it from my teat but I try to be discreet"
I love Tash, she's amazing <3
#20
sarah-4-eva
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Posted 20 May 2004 - 08:18 PM
oh dear.. haha
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