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FANFIC COMPETITION ENTRY


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#1 nightshadewolf

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Posted 30 January 2009 - 06:47 PM

Was it my determination as a doctor to give her another chance at some kind of life or my selfish desire to keep her all for myself? I had come to see her as a corpse rather than a woman so was surprised when a short breath escaped her grey but still beautiful lips. They told me that she'd jumped from the cliff but nobody seemed to know why.
This fragile creature surely wasn't alone in this world? Was there a husband waiting in the reception of the hospital to hear the news that his beloved had taken her own life? No one had yet come to claim her.
Still, she had only lain upon this cold slab for a matter of minutes.
Was it only minutes?
It felt like I had lost days staring into her peaceful face, she seemed so easy as she drew in shuddering breaths that kept her body filled with feeble life. It could be snuffed out at any moment, I wondered if I had the right to do that for her or if I should let nature run its course. It wasn't her time, she'd thrown herself down into those rocks rather than waiting for her life to run into death naturally.
I could give her so much more.
She would be radiant, a true angel but with a cost.
I believed though that so perfect a woman could not be denied into heaven no matter what she became, I was sure that she would bring honour and warmth to our cold kind.
My hand shook, I lifted it only to brush a strand of her auburn hair from her face, I was so scared of breaking her that such a light movement filled me with dread. I wished that I could hear her voice before I did it. If only we had met under different circumstances and then I could have introduced myself properly, had the time to really get to know her. Then would I have had the heart to change her and rip her out of her comfortable human world?
I couldn't bear to see her in such agony any longer. I placed my pale slender fingers against her cheek, warmer than my own skin but so cold for a human. She didn't react at all as I sank my teeth against her jugular and pierced the skin. The venom flowed from my mouth into the wound and her sweet warm blood gushed over my tongue and down my throat.
I pulled away. It was so hard but my longing to be with her overpowered the monster that had risen in my chest.
It was the end of my shift when I stole her away back to the home I shared with Edward.
"What's your name?" the question came on the third day when her eyes finally opened.
"Esme."
Her voice was like a song to me, "I'm Carlisle, there's a lot I need to tell you."
A whole new life.

____________


By: Natalie Penna, Brighton, England - Ticket Number G75

Edited by nightshadewolf, 31 January 2009 - 06:58 PM.


#2 jess8619

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Posted 30 January 2009 - 06:50 PM

Whoa, Screw any chances I had of winning.


That was Awesome! :eek:
Met:
Bands:  You Me At Six, We Are The Ocean (x2)
Actors/Actresses: Kellan Lutz, Peter Facinelli, Ashley Greene, Justin Chon, Christian Serratos, Chaske Spencer, Rachelle Lafevre, Edi Gathegi, Tyson Houseman, Gil Birmingham, Jamie Campbell Bower, Charlie Bewley, Kiowa Gordon, Tinsel Korey


"Baisically jess is planning on seducing Kennedy whilst he's signing her wet t-shirt" ~ LIZZZ! xD


www.twitter.com/jesstii

#3 jazz5490

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Posted 30 January 2009 - 06:52 PM

:eek: amazing!
Eternal Twilight - G78
LFCC 2009
Eternal Twilight 2 - G9
Eternal Twilight 3 - G11
Eternal Twilight 4 - G76
Eternal Twilight 5 - G17
Eternal Twilight 6 - G37
LFCC 2011

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Facebook - http://www.facebook....jazz.is.awesome

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#4 LeahBlack.

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Posted 30 January 2009 - 06:57 PM

Gahhh! Amazingg!
I love how everyone is doing their stories in different POV's :)
This is really sweet :)
xxx

Justin Chon makes me smile :)
                               i'm his homegirl. And i have proof....in writing :D

                                    Me & Liz are The Maine's official groupies ;P

Alice's (candice's) sonnnngs make me smiiiile. :D
'When Leah sings it makes us all smile! It stops silly seth from howling a howl! she rocks like a star, better than you know, it makes us applaud and shout 'Leah put on a show!'

'Leah had Tyson's kid, no one knows how she did! Finest baby you've ever seen! Will follow daddy and be on a movie screen! She made headlines with this golden child, tyson already has her number dialed. She picks up the phone and is pleasantly suprised! She has to explain that she raped him with her eyeeesssss!'

                             ET & ET2 have been the best weekends of my life.
  
                                       in love with Tyson Houseman.<33
                                           http://ohtyson.blogspot.com/


#5 jess8619

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Posted 30 January 2009 - 06:57 PM

I like how we both (My fanfic is about Jasper) used the term "Monster" to describe their feelings of themselves.
Met:
Bands:  You Me At Six, We Are The Ocean (x2)
Actors/Actresses: Kellan Lutz, Peter Facinelli, Ashley Greene, Justin Chon, Christian Serratos, Chaske Spencer, Rachelle Lafevre, Edi Gathegi, Tyson Houseman, Gil Birmingham, Jamie Campbell Bower, Charlie Bewley, Kiowa Gordon, Tinsel Korey


"Baisically jess is planning on seducing Kennedy whilst he's signing her wet t-shirt" ~ LIZZZ! xD


www.twitter.com/jesstii

#6 nightshadewolf

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Posted 30 January 2009 - 06:59 PM

*blushes and hides* thanks guys, I don't usually do fanfics cus it gets me out of the habit of my own writing but I felt like this relationship isn't explored enough in the book, just like all the other 'secondary' characters.

#7 theblackrose

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Posted 30 January 2009 - 07:00 PM

Wow, fantastic.    :eek:
Xander : Shoot me, stuff me, mount me.
The Pack

Emmett : Fall down again Bella?
Bella     : No Emmett. I punched a werewolf in the face.
Eclipse.

Met so far;
Nicholas Brendon, James Marsters, Mercedes McNab, Mark Lutz, James Leary
Peter Facinelli, Ashley Greene, Kellan Lutz, Justin Chon, Christian Serratos, Alex Meraz, Bronson Pelletier, Chaske Spencer, Tyson Houseman
Nathan Fillion, Jewel Staite, Adam Baldwin, Mark Sheppard
Michael Shanks, Michael Ironside, Danny Trejo, Scott Bakula, Sonny Landham, Richard Chaves, Kerri Green, Eve Myles, John Barrowman, Phillip Glenister, Keeley Hawes, Montserrat Lombard, Mark Ryan, Shannon Doherty, John Rhys Davies, Billy Dee Williams, Misha Collins, Julie McNiven, Robert Rusler, Peter Firth, Johnathan Hyde, Ian McNeice, Chris Sarandon, Linda Hamilton, Tommy Knight, Georgia Moffatt, Michelle Forbes, Peter Kwong, Julia Ling, Mark Sheppard, Bonita Friedericy, John Billingsley, Thomas Dekker, Brian Austin Green, Brody Hutzler, Kristanna Loken, Elisabeth Sladen

#8 TSheep

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Posted 30 January 2009 - 07:18 PM

I love you Natalie, you are an awesome writer  :blush:

#9 nightshadewolf

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Posted 30 January 2009 - 07:19 PM

thanks guys *tackles emma* i love you too! <3

#10 Edwardsbackupgirl

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Posted 30 January 2009 - 07:19 PM

thats really good. great description  :blush:
[img]<a href="http://s14.photobucket.com/albums/a314/groovygal2k/?action=view&current=n19705557393_8785.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i14.photobucket.com/albums/a314/groovygal2k/n19705557393_8785.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>[/img]

#11 nightshadewolf

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Posted 30 January 2009 - 07:20 PM

View PostEdwardsbackupgirl, on Jan 30 2009, 07:19 PM, said:

thats really good. great description :smile:

Thankies  :blush:

#12 Bear Hug

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Posted 30 January 2009 - 08:02 PM

Woo love it! Actually great.
Paper cuts drive me wild

#13 nightshadewolf

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Posted 30 January 2009 - 08:05 PM

View PostBear Hug, on Jan 30 2009, 08:02 PM, said:

Woo love it! Actually great.

*blush* thankies  :blush:

#14 Carlistara

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Posted 31 January 2009 - 12:10 AM

View Postnightshadewolf, on Jan 30 2009, 07:59 PM, said:

*blushes and hides* thanks guys, I don't usually do fanfics cus it gets me out of the habit of my own writing but I felt like this relationship isn't explored enough in the book, just like all the other 'secondary' characters.


I absolutely agree! And do love your story! Good luck, hun!  :crying:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Emmett is strong, Edward is kind, Jasper is comforting but Carlisle is mine!
*carlistara@gmail.com*

#15 chimmykins

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Posted 31 January 2009 - 12:40 AM

Esme and Carlisle. <3
I loved reading this. :unsure:
Whedonian #16


SM/ME events attended: ET1, CM15, LFCC09, ET2, Hallowhedon, CML, ET3, CM16, Autographica 2010, LFCC 2010, Bitten, ET4, Hallowhedon 2, EMS/CML, ET5, Chevron 7.6, Collectormania 17, LFCC 2011, Bitten 2, EMS/CML, ET6, Hallowhedon 3, ET7,

Planned events 2011/2012 (so far):
CM 18
LFCC 2012
ET8 (Silver 31)
Bitten 3 (Silver 10)
Hallowhedon 4 (Silver 2)

#16 nightshadewolf

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Posted 31 January 2009 - 06:55 PM

Thanks guys *blush* I hope Peter reads it, I don't mind if I win or not, it's just nice getting people to read my stuff :wub:




i'd like to win tho, lol, i doubt i will, the other stories on here are amazing...

#17 Evie_Nitram

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Posted 02 February 2009 - 10:22 AM

I really enjoyed that. How sweet the bitter turmoil that Carlisle feels about changing her. Well done!
My updated list so far...

George Eads
David Tennant
David Boreanaz
James McAvoy
Daniel Radcliff
Sean Biggerstaff
Elijah Wood (last hobbit that I need!)
Viggo Mortensen
Sean Bean

~ Love Lizzi xxx

makawish20@aol.com

#18 nightshadewolf

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Posted 03 February 2009 - 03:05 PM

View PostEvie_Nitram, on Feb 2 2009, 10:22 AM, said:

I really enjoyed that. How sweet the bitter turmoil that Carlisle feels about changing her. Well done!

Thankie :D
I spose its the way Edward must have felt when Bella was turned, probs the same with all of them.

#19 nightshadewolf

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Posted 19 February 2009 - 06:24 PM

squee! one week away, I can't believe it and the comp is closed. Wow, so many of these fan fics are totally amazing. I don't envy the judges.

#20 xbellarose

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Posted 19 February 2009 - 08:48 PM

Yay for carlisle :YAHOO:
I love this story I think its amazing good luck!
xoxo
"Look after my heart, I've left it with you."
"I hope you live FOREVER" "Bella- You're part of the family now." - Peter Facinelli.

BRING BACK PETER!!

My dream guestlist: Peter, Jackson, Nikki, Rachelle, Mike, Billy!




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